Bedroom Games
by Do Not Even Try
Summary: Jake Ryan does his spin on a classic game. JakeMiley OliverLilly


**A/n: **This is dedicated to All American-Dork06 :) Hope you enjoy, Ellie :D reviews are appreciated

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The moment Lilly Truscott and Oliver Oken entered the Stewart house, Miley apologized.

"I'm really sorry, you guys. I tried to talk sense into him…but…"

She turned her head toward a dark corner of the room. Lilly and Oliver exchanged glances and followed her gaze. They were confused to see a computer chair facing the corner in the room. It was silent for a moment, and then a slow, evil laugh emerged.

"And you thought you had gotten off easily." The voice whispered. Miley sighed in exasperation. "You have all had a chance to pick the games and you have used the opportunity to your advantage. Miley used the knowledge of music, Lilly used her knowledge of sports, and Oliver used his knowledge of food. Now it's my turn." The chair slowly spun around to review Jake Ryan, his hair slicked back and a pipe between his lips. "I'm going to use my knowledge of sex." He laughed evilly again.

Every weekend, the two couples got together and had a game night. Each night a different couple got to pick a game and do their own spin on it. This night was Jake's turn, and it was just like him to pick something so awkward for everyone.

Jake stood up slowly and leisurely walked over to them. He motioned at the table, which held a set up game of Scrabble. Lilly and Oliver exchanged looks of horror. Miley was too busy slamming her palm into her forehead.

"You'll notice I've already set up the basic game. Everything you know about Scrabble applies, except for one little thing." He came to a complete stop in front of them. He smiled slowly. "You can only use words that are of a sexual nature." There was an artificial clap of thunder and he snickered quietly.

"Jake, babe, I really don't think—"

"Silence!" Jake yelled. Miley fell silence and raised an eyebrow. Jake quickly backtracked. He smiled sweetly. "I mean, I would appreciate it if you didn't worry so much, baby. Don't worry, Lilly and Oliver won't find out we're sexually superior just because we know more than them."

He had obviously been intending to get a rise out of the other couple, because he grinned slightly at Oliver's insulted expression. Lilly's eyes narrowed.

"Sit your ass down, Ryan." She murmured darkly.

Let the games begin.

Miley nervously sat down beside her boyfriend, across from her best friend. She wasn't looking forward to this game at all.

"I'm going first, since it's my idea. Then Miley, because she's my girl, then Lilly, then Oliver." Jake ordered.

"That's not the way it wor—"

Jake cut Lilly off.

"It is now. My version, my rules."

Oliver pouted. He turned to his girlfriend.

"I wanted to go first!"

Lilly smiled sympathetically.

"Don't worry, honey! You can go first next time!"

Jake closed his eyes and selected seven random tiles. He kept his hands blocking the tiles from view of everyone else, and a slow smile spread over his face.

"Hump." He pronounced clearly. He carefully spelled the word out on the bored. Oliver laughed immaturely and Miley buried her face in her hands.

"Seriously, Jake? You couldn't have started out with anything lighter than that?! At this rate this game will last about as long as our abstinence did!"

Jake smiled dreamily.

"We have some great memories on that porch."

Miley smacked his arm. Lilly looked appalled.

"The _porch_?! What the hell is wrong with you two?! You couldn't even make it to the piano?!" She gave them disgusted looks.

"Piano! Oh that's a kinky idea!" Jake exclaimed. He turned to his girlfriend. "What do you say?"

She flicked his forehead. "I say shut up before I make you go a week without sex."

He got quiet very quickly.

It was Miley's turn, and she was not looking forward to it. She started to draw tiles, but Jake stopped her.

"I get to draw them for you guys!" No one even bothered objecting. He handed Miley seven tiles. She glanced at them, immediately hating the word she knew she was going to have to use.

She bit her lip and glanced up. "Lord, please forgive me."

She quickly spelled out her word. Everyone laughed, but were silenced by her glare.

"Announce your word." Jake demanded. She glared. They glared at each other for what could have been a span of three minutes, before she finally gave in.

"Head." She mumbled, before falling into a fake coughing fit to hopefully keep herself out of the conversation. Oliver laughed immaturely for a few more minutes before his eyebrow furrowed in confusion.

"Wait. Head? How is that sexual?"

The remaining at the table exchanged looks.

"I guess you wouldn't know that, would you, Oken?" Jake smirked. Lilly whispered something in Oliver's ear. His face colored.

"Right…I knew that…" He fell into a coughing fit also.

"Umm…my turn!" Lilly yelled, hoping to lessen the tension at the table. Jake drew her tiles and set them in her cupped hands. She turned around and lined them up on the couch, pondering of them. She turned and set an F above the U in _hump _and a C under the U and a K under the C.

Miley sniffed and patted the Scrabble board.

"Our little board is all grown up and losing its virginity." She cried dramatically.

Jake wrapped an arm around her. "The good news is that it lost it to the best looking group of people around."

Oliver grinned. "Thanks, man!"

Jake kept his face even. "I wasn't talking about you."

"Oh, right." Oliver said quickly.

Jake drew Oliver's tiles and passed them to him. Oliver made a big point of getting up and walking over to the island. He pondered over his tiles with his back turned before he strutted back over.

He carefully set a A tile above the M in _hump _and then a B over the A.

"Bam?" Miley asked, confused. She looked at Lilly. Lilly shrugged.

"What the hell, Oliver? That isn't a word." Jake argued. He reached to take the tiles off but Oliver threw himself over the board.

"No! It is too a word and it's my word and you can't have it!"

Jake realized Oliver meant business.

"Fine. If you're willing to lose points over it." Jake shrugged and made Oliver's score negative five.

"My turn!" Jake sang. He picked his tiles carefully, and you could tell by his expression that he didn't have such a good variety. He glanced at his girlfriend once, and then looked back at the tiles. He repeated that cycle before he grinned triumphantly.

Miley prayed.

He used the B from _bam, _and spelled out the following: _babyoooh_

Everyone stared. Miley fell into a coughing fit again and purposely hit the table, but her luck wasn't on her side because the tiles didn't move an inch.

"What the hell is _that_?" Oliver yelled, publically enjoying the fact Jake Ryan was about to lose.

Jake smirked.

"The sound your girlfriend never makes."

Oliver narrowed his eyes. "I know you just didn't go there." He turned to Lilly. "Did he say that? Did he really go there?"

Lilly bit her lip. "I think he did, honey. I think he went there."

Oliver stood up. Jake stood up too. They stared at each other before Oliver cringed away a bit. He grinned and clapped his hands together.

"So who wants some popcorn?"

No one said anything. Oliver awkwardly sunk back to the ground.

"Now wait a minute!" Lilly screamed. Everyone looked at her. "I don't appreciate you insulting Ollie! Unless you're his secret lover you'd have no idea what kind of sounds he makes girls make!"

"Yeah!"

"I mean, it could be a moan, or maybe a scream, or maybe even crying…"

"YEAH! I—hey…wait a minute!"

"The point is: that isn't a word! That's a sound! And by rules you can't use that!"

"My rules say that I can. Anything sexual goes, and that's very sexual. Isn't it, Miley?"

She glared.

"I'd appreciate if you kept our bedroom _off _the Scrabble board." She crossed her arms over her chest.

Lilly sighed, her anger simmering down. It was only one night. Jake Ryan had gotten his ego bruised every other night the past four weeks, and it was obvious he had a score to settle.

The game continued with the words increasingly getting worse and worse. By the time the tiles were gone, everyone was exhausted.

Miley yawned.

"Let's go up to bed."

Everyone nodded sleepily. They started up the stairs. Miley turned to Jake.

"By that I mean go to a guest room."

Jake pouted.

Once everyone was in their respectable rooms, a car pulled up in the driveway. Maybe if Jake hadn't of picked such an embarrassing topic, Miley would have remembered her dad was getting back from Tennessee today, not tomorrow. Maybe if her boyfriend hadn't spelled out their sex life on a Scrabble board she would have remembered he was getting home tonight and sent her friends home. Maybe if she would have remembered, after she sent her friends home she would have cleared off the incriminating Scrabble board.

But for whatever reason, Miley Stewart didn't remember her dad was coming home, and therefore, when Robbie Ray entered his house, he found a Scrabble board on the table with some very upsetting words. He also found a tally with his daughter's boyfriend coming in first.

"MILEY RAY STEWART!" He yelled.

Little did he know, that was the least of the problems. When he walked upstairs to scream at his daughter, he would find the champion himself in bed with her.


End file.
